If you could go back in time and see me when I was in elementary/middle school you would not recognize me. The most likely reason for that being you probably wouldn’t have noticed me at all. That’s right, I was the shy kid! I never spoke up in class, did not talk to anyone that wasn’t my friend, and I definitely never wanted to be the center of attention. You remember those images on Facebook where you used to tag your friends as “the sporty one” or “the one who always makes you laugh”? I was always tagged as “the quiet one.” This was all because of this thing that lives inside my head that I like to call “the over-worrier.”
Some people would probably refer to this feeling as a type of anxiety, but it is something I deal with where this little voice pops up in my head during everyday situations and starts making me think about the “what if’s.” In fact they’re happening right now as I am writing this post. What if people think I’m weird because I deal with this? What if people don’t understand what I’m going through? What if this scares people away? What if people don’t like my blog? Those are the types of questions that float around my head in any given situation. It happens a lot and when I was younger I definitely let “the over-worrier” take control of me. I didn’t talk to a lot in front of a big group of people because I was worried that I would say something wrong or stupid that would make people not like me. This made people think I was shy, but I actually really wanted to make lots of friends and talk to people! I was just too busy worrying about what to say that I never got to say anything.
Thankfully, in high school (especially junior & senior year) I started gaining the power to fight back against the “over-worrier.” I decided I wasn’t going to miss out on so much anymore because I was too busy worrying about it. So what if I say something stupid or someone doesn’t like what I’m wearing? I have a creator that made me in his image and thinks I’m pretty cool. He put me on this planet with a purpose and that alone is enough to not let the worrying stop me from fulfilling his plan for me.
I began talking to new people more and making new friends; which was something that always used to terrify me because of worrying about what people who didn’t know me would think of me. I joined the greeter team at church last year, and that has been a tremendous help to overcoming the worrying that comes with meeting new people. Within a few months of being a greeter I became a team leader and find “the over-worrier” becoming a lot quieter. It can be a really good thing to get out of your comfort zone every now and then; you might even discover something that makes you really happy!
“The over-worrier” is someone who I still deal with on a daily basis, but I am trying my best not to let it overcome me and control all my decisions. I have managed to overcome a lot of battles with worrying and will continue to do so with the strength of lord with me. If you found this post to be relatable I would love to talk about it with you! I also have a lot more stories of dealing with over-worrying, so if you’d like to read more let me know.
Have a lovely week!
(featured photo by the incredibly talented and super rad Peter Nelson)